sad blog post - get kleenex ready

>> so this is a sad blog post. the next morning, my host father and i walked to the school. upon arrival and plugging in his phone to charge, i got a call on my phone. from his wife. i answered. 'tell pa aruna his daughter is seriously sick. he needs to come home to bo now.' i told my host father, and we quickly found him a bike. he packed his belongings, we had a hurried goodbye, and then he left. i called my host mother to tell him he had departed and she replied, 'his daughter is dead.' my host father was already gone and i couldn't inform him, so we let it be. he called me later to tell me that he had arrived and that his daughter had died. during all of this, the fun night before, the frantic morning, the aftermath of drinking and feeling solemn, queen was continuing to nibble at his tail, which leads us to even more bad news... the skin infection there continued to grow, eating his fur, so we tried local remedies which included the black inside chalky powder of a battery on the wound and later GV (gentian violet) a stain. what we really needed was some antibiotic cream and one of those collars that prevents the dog from biting it. with no improvement, i called the veterinarian that had done neutering, spaying, and rabies injections for my dogs in the past. he sensed the agitation in my voice and came the next morning and began double injections of antibiotics in the morning and night. (night morning night morning (no night) morning night). i was never there for the injections because i cannot handle the fight and sadness and anger queen put up when being treated. i was the first person he ran to after the injection and served as counsel. after this final night injection, he ran to me as normal, i petted him, and then he began to twitch, convulse, and stumble, whimpering and struggling to breathe. we took him inside the house. we laid him down but i got *that* feeling. i moved close and pet his neck and said his name comfortingly until he stopped breathing. i broke down sobbing. after a few minutes i came outside to everyone yelling and sad, seeing the look on my tear-stained face. i called my parents, and we made the difficult decision to take queen to the bush now instead of in the morning. we wrapped queen in a bag and went into the bush. a friend of mine called but i darkly responded, "I'll call you back. My dog just died." We laid Queen down. I said, "Give me a minute." I pet him a little bit more, and then we walked back to the house without him. I believe that my veterinarian, who worked primarily with livestock, gave Queen too much antibiotic too quickly too fast for his small size, but the veterinarian reiterated that this was the first dog he has ever lost. this all happened on april 20th and ive done my grieving and am trying to move on, but i felt it necessary to make a blogpost. love you, queen. i love and miss you all. :(

even more last thoughts on COS conference

>> some moments you might enjoy: (a) while i took my bucket bath at the hill valley hotel (one of the most expensive hotels in freetown but still without functioning showers) the lights went out. for a moment i stood in the shower, naked, in a completely dark bathroom, and  then broke out into giggles at my life. i continued reaching down to the bucket and finished my bath in the dark only for the lights to return on once i'd finished.. (b) the last night of the COS conference was a big night for my group.. we were treated to pizza at mamba point by our country directors and then broke off into groups to prepare for the night - most of my friends made our way to ace's where the DJ played an amazing set (like a prayer, 'believe' by cher, chris brown, pitbull, david guetta, etc.) and we danced the night away. it was a nice sense of closure since most of these friendships really blossomed around vicani nightclub in bo (during our training) and the nights we spent enjoying and dancing together.. (c) my host father was finally able to visit! foday and i waited in town and then he got down slow and stiff but had a great night together drinking palm wine (which he remarked was amazing) and spending time together sharing stories about me. unfortunately, problems arose... [next blog post..] I love and miss you all.

logistics 'n stuff

>> our COS (close of service) conference is now over! it was certainly a somewhat awkward affair - imagine if you will a sort of high school reunion of sorts, the same arguments, cliques, and crushes sort of resurface and swirl around but, more importantly, we worked on the logistics of our departure (terrifying / exciting). we talked about plane tickets, about how our payments will be organized, medical information (including exciting stool samples!) and even the stuff we should leave at our houses for the next volunteer and what things need to be returned to Peace Corps. There was debate amongst us about some choices, do you (a) transfer money into the bank account (b) take a check to your home (c) take a check in freetown, etc. (I'm sending the check to my home - I'll lose it if he gives it to me in Freetown..) It was nice to see our bosses again, see our doctor again, see the other volunteers again but now, as if there was any doubt, we are definitely in the home stretch. Peace Corps gave us advice about the last few months, how it is indeed different than the rest of our service, their suggestions on how best to leave things, how to find closure (if possible), and the beginnings of the dicussions about how to try to fit back into American life... I love and miss you all.

some recent events

some recent events in the past few weeks:

• 
  
  my book was published! my parents called and while it was entirely anti-climactic to find out in the middle of the jungle (foday poured another cup of wine, it continued being hot, food kept being made) it was really exciting to finally be published! go to amazon.com and search for 'bryan meeker' and my novel pops right up!


• 
  
  a man from guinea came to my normal watering hole and accused me of killing Muammar Gaddafi.. in traditional PC response, i smiled and nodded and laughed along, but the man got more and more serious and more and more angry, finally swearing out me and then my mother. about half a heartbeat after swearing out my mother, foday and sori and pa kandie were all on their feet and ready to beat the man senseless. the next thirty minutes was spent with him apologizing and my friends cooling down but it was a mixture of terrifying / encouraging / loving to see how quickly my friends came to my aid


• 
  
  they've built a train line across my route to makeni to transport the iron ore and stuff but ive never seen the train and now, i've seen it! it was amazing!!! (i may have teared up a little because i'm pathetic) but it was a regular old train like you'd see in america pulling 93 cars of iron ore.. incredible.. it made the poda-poda shake it was so big..


• 
  
  apparently i don't look american, so that's.. interesting. in the past few weeks i was asked if i am spanish because 'you look,.. you look somehow spanish..' and also 'are you dutch? you look.. you look dutch because you are calm and cooooool..' so there's that.


• 
  
  i love going to the amvil restaurant next to the sierra leone commercial bank and went today but, it being the easter holiday weekend, it was closed, so i went across the street and ate with the locals to their surprise and shock.. i love doing that. yes, i can eat cassava leaf. yes, i can sit on an old wooden bench. no, it's not too hot for me,..etc.

i'm in town for the COS conference on monday and tuesday, so hopefully ill get to post again before heading back upline to the village! :)

you know you're integrated when:

i jotted these down amidst cups of palm wine and hiding from the burning hot sun,..

1. realizing that when you pull your bucket of water and there are red biting ants in it, that you're happy when most of them are dead and you can flick the alive ones out and move on with your bathing


2. 
   
   realizing that you're happy that when your friend returns home after having killed 'bush meat' and when you ask 'what kind?' he replies 'bush deer' and you are happy because it's your favorite, after all


3. 
   
   your water filter is pretty much a decoration - you now drink the same water as your neighbors from the same cups as your neighbors - your system has dealt with giardia twice and you never get diarrhea anymore; your body doesn't take anything from anyone anymore


4. 
   
   you yell at children for wearing their pants halfway down their butts, not going to school, or using phones at the school and the other villagers understand, agree, and scold the children too


5. 
   
   you get into a poda-poda and immediately let out a 'oooooOOOOoooo' because you note that it is, in fact, a new poda-poda and not the typical older model year version


6. 
   
   you greet someone in Themne and the driver (a Loko) looks over and says, 'You know more Themne than I do! You are really trying!"


7. 
   
   whilst getting into the backseat of a vehicle (four people across), the africans say, 'no no this man will not be comfortable, he must sit somewhere else!' and me saying 'pffft. let's go. i'm fine.' the driver shrugging, and the vehicle moving.

i love and miss you all.. (and ill think of more :)

the march trip to freetown (5 of 5)

>> a happier post, i promise, in that we're beginning to see the end of the race here. the discussions amongst us volunteers is beginning to be our plans afterward, beginning to be questions about whats next, about the stresses awaiting us, and our plans for our COS (close of service) trip. the plan for myself, for those that care, is to leave gbendembu on july 23rd, go through the final clearances and paperwork in freetown, officially COS on july 27th, and then depart on july 29th from freetown to paris for two weeks in france before returning home to america on august 12th. there's a sizeable party planned for august 17th, but ill give you more details about that later. the important thing i want to convey is that while weve had student deaths, fights, problems, heartaches, sorrow, depression, and even diarrhea, that now, with only about 137 days left, we're beginning to feel a lightness, that we can do this, that we're *so* close that now it's a piece of cake. we'll see if the feeling lasts, but for the past few weeks myself and at least three other volunteers have all expressed similar feelings, that our time is drawing to a close. i love and miss you all :)

the march trip to freetown (4 of 5)

>> so last year my school had a sport competition. for those playing the home game, this means that the school is broken up into four houses and they compete against each other basically in an overblown track & field event competition. last year, this meant a complete shutdown of my school for almost two months and, at the climax, one of my students (a girl) being punched in the face by another student (a boy) because she dropped the baton during one of the relays. at that, i yelled / scolded / screamed at the man directly in charge of my 'house' and went home and swore it off, "I'm never participating in a sport again." this year, we said that since last year's sport got out of hand, that we would not have one this year. we changed our minds. i was put on green house. i demanded to be taken off, and was removed from it and put on the committee which i summarily ignored. i was then harassed by my students for my non-attendance and non-support. i used excuses like 'im really busy' or 'i have to input all these grades' but the truth is that i refuse to be part of something that in itself is a PERFECT example of all that is wrong with education here. putting a sporting competition before student education is just plain WRONG. in my opinion. (i have not taught in two weeks, the students were dismissed). I love and miss you all :)