so its over,.. (1 of 4)

>> four closing blog posts. backing up, the last few weeks of instruction went well, finished less material than i did last year, but i can only blame this on a general lack of student motivation and attendance - I was there every class ready to go and sometimes found the classroom less than 10% full (an average class might have 13 students when it should have had 60). with school officially closed sometime around july 6th, i returned to my job as assistant to the chair of the exams and records committee (let's just say i was pretty much in charge) and began the tedious (TEDIOUS) process of inputting every student's grades for Test One and Test Two for Term Three. that's two tests x 50 students a class x 9 subjects x 13 forms. it's a lot. however, i still came home from school to find foday and my close friends ready and waiting with laughter, love, palm wine, and good food. tink, in her wisdom, began to sense something awry and was especially clingy, sleeping inside the house for the first time during my service and, in the last two weeks, sleeping with me in my bed. (i want to believe she sensed a change in my emotional ((or hormonal)) demeanor because she was never like this before). with the grades entered and my official responsibilities finished, i could turn my attention to the staff quarters construction which takes us to post #2. i love and miss you all :)

goodbye to dr. laura

>> as is the way with government organizations (or any real organization i suppose), there must be overlap and continuity between incoming and outgoing staffs. june 22nd marks the departure of our doctor, Dr. Laura, who has helped myself ((boils, diarrhea, dehydration, giardia, rabies (disproved), blisters, gashes (from the freetown streets), and nightmares and insomnia (thank you, malaria medication)), as well as many other volunteers and trainees with their medical and psychological problems. im not ashamed to say that on more than one occasion it has been laura that either with compassion or sarcasm or a little bit of both had gotten me past rough patches, whether it was something as physical as diarrhea or something as ethereal as nightmares and insomnia. her replacement, steven tull, sounds like a nice man (i've only talked to him on the phone as of yet), but i look forward to working with him for the short time i'll be under his care. i am happy for salone 3 (who arrived june 7th and are now in bo for training) because they will have mr. tull for a majority of their service - he will leave around the time laura is leaving, respectively. anyway, in conclusion, thank you, dr. laura, for doing your job professionally and practically, never failing to set us straight when we went awry but also always being there to care for us when you were needed. thank you. i love and miss you all :)

africa is cruella devil

>> play along with this analogy for me. if africa was cruella devil, she would know when you were happy and then destroy those feelings. some examples: a) you've had a great day teaching! (AFRICA NOTICES) you now have devastating diarrhea all night! b) you're really tired and need a restful night of sleep! (AFRICA SEES) you now have a deafening terrifying lightning-enriched thunderstorm that makes you think that your zinc roof might just fly off and into the jungle! c) you're excited about your last day of teaching! (AFRICA OBSERVES) you go to class to find it mostly empty and your students not all that upset that you're done standing in front of them attempting to instruct them.. i could go on. i should clarify that this is almost always done with a humorous context, that when i talk to a friend and say 'but then the best thing happened...' that my friend will reply with, 'shhhhhhhhh SHE'S LISTENING!' and then we chuckle. perhaps its time for us to come home, eh? i love and miss you all :)

finally back in freetown

>> sorry. i've been away from freetown for far too long. since we talked last, lots has happened. your briefing begins now: a) I finished teaching! As of last Thursday, the 7th, I finished instruction. It was a relief to finally be finished with teaching which, if we're being honest, which i try to be all the time, was getting a little worn around the edges. the students no longer had any interest, stopped coming to school altogether, and only vaguely gave any appearance of interest in their studies. it's nice to be done, but of course, the work continues.. now i get to enter all the grades (55 students per class x 9 subjects x 13 classes x 2 tests) and then do the clerical work to end up the year right. there's a lot to be done before i can happily put a pretty bow on my service, but we're on our way! b) We decided to get another dog! I say this now, that this will not WILL NOT be my dog, that this is Foday's dog FODAY'S DOG! that we are getting when I return home on Sunday. one of my teachers' dogs had puppies and sunday night we will bring him home (already named 'patience' by foday) and continue on. i know that this will not replace queen, but it will be nice to have a sprightly puppy around again... c) the goodbyes have started. i have had multiple people come up to me with no other purpose than to tell me how much they will miss me, on some occasions, intermingled with tears and people saying things like, 'i dont know what we will do without you' or 'i dont know what i will do without you.' we are told in peace corps that you have a beginning, that rough first patch, followed by a lengthy middle part, where everything is more or less the same, and then, (where we are now), the end, when everything has underneath it that sense of ending, like crunchy leaves - every step you take can't be taken without being reminded that this is the last time i go here, the last time i do that, the last time we celebrate this together. the goodbyes have begun.. i love and miss you all :)

the remainder

>> so here's what's left for me. on may 18th, ill be going to a birthday party for joey peterson. the last weekend in may i go to bo to see my host family one last time. on june 14th i come back to freetown for our going away party for our peace corps doctor on june 15th. on july 4th or 6th, depending on schooling, i go to port loko for our 4th of july party. on july 21st, we have a huge party in gbendembu and on the 22nd, i go to freetown. on the 23rd, i take my TB test and begin the mess of paperwork, finally 'COS'ing on july 27th. we are allowed one extra week around the peace corps compound after that date to wrap things up, and on the 29th, i head off to paris and france for my COS trip. i return home to america on august 12th. it's coming to an end frightfully quickly here, with about 86 days left until i leave my village for freetown finally and therefore only about 6 or 7 real weeks of teaching left.. ill be in gbendembu doing my best to teach as much as i can while trying to ensure that they understand it, but the time remaining is small :) i love and miss you all :)

sad blog post - get kleenex ready

>> so this is a sad blog post. the next morning, my host father and i walked to the school. upon arrival and plugging in his phone to charge, i got a call on my phone. from his wife. i answered. 'tell pa aruna his daughter is seriously sick. he needs to come home to bo now.' i told my host father, and we quickly found him a bike. he packed his belongings, we had a hurried goodbye, and then he left. i called my host mother to tell him he had departed and she replied, 'his daughter is dead.' my host father was already gone and i couldn't inform him, so we let it be. he called me later to tell me that he had arrived and that his daughter had died. during all of this, the fun night before, the frantic morning, the aftermath of drinking and feeling solemn, queen was continuing to nibble at his tail, which leads us to even more bad news... the skin infection there continued to grow, eating his fur, so we tried local remedies which included the black inside chalky powder of a battery on the wound and later GV (gentian violet) a stain. what we really needed was some antibiotic cream and one of those collars that prevents the dog from biting it. with no improvement, i called the veterinarian that had done neutering, spaying, and rabies injections for my dogs in the past. he sensed the agitation in my voice and came the next morning and began double injections of antibiotics in the morning and night. (night morning night morning (no night) morning night). i was never there for the injections because i cannot handle the fight and sadness and anger queen put up when being treated. i was the first person he ran to after the injection and served as counsel. after this final night injection, he ran to me as normal, i petted him, and then he began to twitch, convulse, and stumble, whimpering and struggling to breathe. we took him inside the house. we laid him down but i got *that* feeling. i moved close and pet his neck and said his name comfortingly until he stopped breathing. i broke down sobbing. after a few minutes i came outside to everyone yelling and sad, seeing the look on my tear-stained face. i called my parents, and we made the difficult decision to take queen to the bush now instead of in the morning. we wrapped queen in a bag and went into the bush. a friend of mine called but i darkly responded, "I'll call you back. My dog just died." We laid Queen down. I said, "Give me a minute." I pet him a little bit more, and then we walked back to the house without him. I believe that my veterinarian, who worked primarily with livestock, gave Queen too much antibiotic too quickly too fast for his small size, but the veterinarian reiterated that this was the first dog he has ever lost. this all happened on april 20th and ive done my grieving and am trying to move on, but i felt it necessary to make a blogpost. love you, queen. i love and miss you all. :(

even more last thoughts on COS conference

>> some moments you might enjoy: (a) while i took my bucket bath at the hill valley hotel (one of the most expensive hotels in freetown but still without functioning showers) the lights went out. for a moment i stood in the shower, naked, in a completely dark bathroom, and  then broke out into giggles at my life. i continued reaching down to the bucket and finished my bath in the dark only for the lights to return on once i'd finished.. (b) the last night of the COS conference was a big night for my group.. we were treated to pizza at mamba point by our country directors and then broke off into groups to prepare for the night - most of my friends made our way to ace's where the DJ played an amazing set (like a prayer, 'believe' by cher, chris brown, pitbull, david guetta, etc.) and we danced the night away. it was a nice sense of closure since most of these friendships really blossomed around vicani nightclub in bo (during our training) and the nights we spent enjoying and dancing together.. (c) my host father was finally able to visit! foday and i waited in town and then he got down slow and stiff but had a great night together drinking palm wine (which he remarked was amazing) and spending time together sharing stories about me. unfortunately, problems arose... [next blog post..] I love and miss you all.